How to Take Great Headshots even though 20 minutes ago you were teasing out how to ask your ex to [platonically] hold you while you cry

Is this blog just a cry for help? 

Is it click bait?

Wasn’t this supposed to be done in good faith?

I’ve needed new headshots since well before my first blog post here where I admit that the headshots I used to apply for grad school were taken ten years ago. It was just the photo that matched most closely to my haircut at the time. 

Oh baby, Faith. 

I resisted getting new headshots for all the typical reasons. Let’s if we can name them together:

They’re too expensive.

I don’t know what my casting is anymore.

I can’t bear to be perceived.

I have a zit.

I have to wash my cat.

Seeing them together, they don’t seem like very good excused do they? 

Getting new headshots is an uncomfortable experience. 

That’s just true. 

I don’t know what it’s like to be so beautiful you don’t worry about getting in front of a camera. I hear even the most breathtaking creatures on Earth are wracked with their own insecurities. A symmetrical face and smoking bod don’t make you immune to unkind self-talk. 

Body positivity and wellness culture is rife with misunderstandings and controversies. I can’t get into it here. I’m simply not qualified but I’ll happily refer to some of my favorite podcasts on the subject: Maintenance Phase and Fad Camp.

My net experience of the whole thing, as an actor, is that while we’re getting a lot messaging encouraging us to see the unique beauty in ourselves, that often feels superficial when the rubber meets the road of the entertainment industry. 

It’s getting easier as I get older– the way everyone said it would. 

I’ve made some peace with myself. So, to the extent that you’re capable, where you are in your relationship to yourself and your time on this planet, my first piece of advice is:

Approach this from a place of play

I used to psych myself out so bad. 

The stakes seem so high. The pressure is on. 

But

And hear me out

What if we just played? 

Theaters put on plays. Actors play a role. 

When kids play, do they look stressed out and wracked with self-loathing? 

Remember enjoying things?

Make Peace with Your Face

I’ll be honest. I do not look like what I think I look like.

 Is face dysmorphia a thing? If it is, I have it. Or have had, in the past. Here’s what’s helped.

Mirror Work

Google it for a better description if you care to, but to the best of my understanding, it entails sitting your butt down in front of a mirror, breathing intentionally, quieting your sympathetic nervous system, and perceiving yourself until (hopefully) you enter a meditative, trance state in which a feeling of goodwill blooms within you. 

There’s those apocryphal stories about how Jim Carey would make faces in the car mirror when he was a little boy to amuse himself. We might call this gurning. There are even competitions for gurning, or making extremely odd, silly faces. They say Marilyn Monroe would study her face in the mirror to understand how she’d appear on film. 

Grotowski would call it Mask Work. The goal here would be to have such awareness and control of ones’ facial muscles and expressions that one could construct a “mask” using only your real face. The application of this could be extreme as in his company’s productions of Acropolis– but as a contemporary actor I find it helpful to recontextualize what my face is as an actor.

My face is not a slab of meat of which I must impotently, desperately, violently demand beauty or (Dionysis help us) youth. 

My face is part of my body. My body, as they say, is my instrument. Therefore my face is part of my actors’ instrument. My face could be the mask if I work it. 

And of course, time. 

The clichés are so for a reason after all:

Be yourself, everyone else is taken. 

I’d rewrite it to:

Make peace with your face, every other face is taken.

Be Specific and Have Fun with your Casting

Now that we hopefully have some acceptance and peace regarding our face- let’s go ahead and do the scary thing and try to figure out where you might work.

Think about shows that are on TV right now. Think about the fact that Gen Z and Alpha aren’t super into long form content. Think about the shows and content you like. Where do you see yourself? What makes you excited? 

Go ahead, be a little irreverent. 

I lovingly refer to one of my new shots as the “CBS Detective.” I’m wearing an olive green coat and looking sternly into the camera. I love it. It makes me laugh every time I look at it because I just look so sincere. 

Can you pull off a cute nurse in Greys Anatomy? Are you the new sub at Abbot Elementary? Think of it as dress up! Think of it as an elaborate con. 

If you have good friends you trust who get what acting and headshots are about, who can be kind and encouraging and reasonably impartial- ask them for their input. What shows could they picture you in?

Now reverse engineer that into a television or film archetype.

Now pick the top two or three archetypes you see the most on tv and film. Theoretically that would translate into the deepest pool of opportunities. 

Remember, acting is a gamble.

Remember to Act

You’re an actor right? 

Make a little character for these archetypes you’ve discovered. 

Then, when you’re in front of the camera, try thinking some of the lines you’d think they’d have. For example, when I was playing with my CBS Detective archetype, I held thoughts in my mind like:

“I will find your daughter.”

“You seem to think you can lie to me, Sergeant.” 

“I may not have the evidence yet, but I know it was you.” 

And so on and so forth.

Have fun! Be playful! Use the session as an opportunity to improvise a little. 

If you’re thinking the characters’ lines/thoughts, then you’ll have less space in your brain to think unkind or unhelpful thoughts. You’ll be too busy living as the CBS detective (or whatever your chosen archetype is) to bully yourself. 

And, just like acting for the camera, if you’re thinking what the character is thinking, and present and relaxed enough, and you give yourself permission, those thoughts will play across your face in a way that appears both natural and compelling. 

Environment- In & Out

Like anything, set yourself up for success. 

For example: I know I’m an anxious creature. I know being active, even for a short time, helps expel my excess nervous energy. I know eating helps. I know rushing is a bad idea. If I’m doing my own hair and makeup I’m gonna need some extra time. 

Most photographers will be happy to let you play whatever music you like during the session.

Choosing a good photographer is a huge factor in your headshots. If you’re looking to go the pro route, you could spend hours combing websites but I’ve always had better luck with recommendations from friends. 

Especially if that friend is booking with the headshots this person took. 

You could also spring for professional hair and makeup but also make sure you do your research on them too. Make sure they know how to style the kind of hair length and texture you’d got going on.

I’ve also been extra, stupid lucky to have photography savvy friends who will take my headshots for cheap or trade. This is nice too because then you have a friend there. The pressure is off and you can spend the day making each other laugh. 

I was so depressed the day I took these headshots I was worried I wouldn’t be able to stop crying long enough to put on my makeup. I was making plans in my head to ask my photographer to hold me while I wept after we wrapped. 

I didn’t.

We ended up having fun. 

Afterward, I was really proud of myself. 

I don’t know yet if these headshots will book. 

I do know that I was the lowest I’ve been in a long time before we started and I had the best time I’ve ever had taking headshots. 

I felt strong, capable, and present because I was at peace with my face, I knew what archetypes I was going for, and I let myself be an actor at play. I’d set myself up for success in my body and in my environment. 

And you know what? Looking at the raw images, I feel pretty good.